Having the Same Standards in a Relationship

Having the same standards is tough sometimes. For example, if you can go out for drinks with friends and stay out as late as you want, you better be willing to feel comfortable with your partner doing the same. If, however, you’d want your spouse at home with you each night and checking in periodically, you should consider holding yourself to the same standard.

Standards often come together in the form of a compromise in a relationship. And it doesn’t just apply to etiquette and time spent with friends either. It also applies to working and spending habits, meeting each other’s intimate and emotional needs, family involvement, household chores, and caring for the children.

If you feel like you’re being treated unfairly, or you suspect that there may be some double standards in the relationship, a quick way to test for equity is to simply ask yourself, “Would I be comfortable with this if the roles were reversed?”

If the answer is yes, then you’re cool. If the answer is no, perhaps it’s worth reconsidering the rules, roles, and standards of the relationship.